2010.03.03 14:19:58

knoxtennman

Self-Imposed Chastity → Lesson Learned

Well, I've learned something about myself and self-imposed chastity. If I don't have a specific goal, I have far less self control. It was no more than two or three hours after my last blog post that the device came off any chance of extending my lock up and denial record came to an end. I've been out of the device ever since. Before I lock up again, I need to set a goal then determine the right day to start the lock up so it fits in with my wife's, and my life's, schedule. Then I must immediately lock the main key in the lock box and send the combination photo to the keyholder website. I seem to be pretty good about not using the emergency key. I'll try to spend some time figuring all that out in the next day or two.

chastity | goals

2010.03.01 16:18:55

knoxtennman

Self-Imposed Chastity → What to do?

Between Thursday night and Sunday morning, I'd say I was locked up about 50% of the time. Even when I was wearing it, I was only doing so to not lose any progress my body was making on getting used to having it on. My wife has a head cold so I pretty much "entertained myself" on Friday and Saturday. By late Saturday morning, my mind began to consider what my next chastity goal would be. I locked back up on Saturday afternoon although I did take it back off Sunday afternoon for a few hours to make a few things easier on me. It had only been a little of 24 hours so I wasn't worried about lacking the will power to keep from cheating.

At this point, I'm not entirely sure what my goal is. If I stay locked up until Thursday again, that would be 1 day longer than the last time. That seems like a reasonable goal from both an orgasm denial point of view and the continuous wearing of the CB-3000 point of view. However, Thursday morning is one of the two best opportunities I have to have sex with my wife (due to her schedule) and if I've gone 5 days without release, I'm not going to last all that long should I get the opportunity. That's not going to make her very happy and could cause a problem with her tolerance of my self-imposed chastity play. If I'd ever had even a little bit of success at milking my prostate, I'd give that a try as that might be enough for me to avoid popping off too soon. The other option would be to unlock myself for a ruined orgasm on Tuesday but I can count the number of times I've really made my self stop and completely ruin it on one hand and have several fingers left over. I always start off fully intending to ruin it, but when the moment arrives, I don't have the will power to let it slip away. I'll figure something out, I guess.

On a positive note, I've determined that I can ride the stationary bikes at my gym with no problem while wearing the CB-3000. The next step will be to see if I can comfortable ride my road bike. I'll probably have to wait a week or so for the weather to warm up a bit before I try that. The two things that worry me about the road bike is the much narrower shape of the saddle and the fact that being bent over on a rode bike for an hour or two frequently causes me to "turtle up" pretty significantly. I'm worried that I'll slip out of the device and I have no idea what kind of discomfort/pain/damage that might cause.

chastity | goals | sex | exercise

2010.02.23 14:43:35

knoxtennman

Self-Imposed Chastity → No Joy

As bad luck would have it, my wife was too busy and definitely not in the mood to have any fun last night. I reset the combination on my key safe and uploaded a pic to the keyholder website. I set it for a release time of late morning on Thursday then told it to randomize a release time near the end. I told it to give me an approximate release time instead of the hot/cold indicator and it is showing a time that is around midnight Wednesday night. I'm going to assume that it will be sometime in the wee hours of Thursday morning and I'll end up having to wait until I have the house to myself before I can get the key and unlock. That will be 5 days since my last orgasm. That's no big deal to long time chastity enthusiasts, but for a newbie, it will be a nice achievement.

I've actually gone longer than 5 days on willpower alone, but it's quite different when wearing the device. It is a CONSTANT reminder that I can't have an orgasm. I can't even tease myself. When I was doing it on willpower, I would still masturbate to the edge at least a couple of times a day. I thought that was making it harder to meet my goal, but now I'm not so sure. At least during the other times of the day, my mind could be completely off of sex. But while I've finally gotten the CB-3000 adjusted to a point that it is reasonable comfortable, I'm almost always aware of it. I'm hoping that will change over time and I'll become so used to it that I don't notice it because I just don't see how I can extend voluntary chastity more than a few days otherwise.

chastity | keyholder.r307.com | goals

2010.02.11 13:53:20

knoxtennman

Self-Imposed Chastity → Short Break

My 48 hour continuous lockup ended during the middle of the day yesterday so I took everything off and checked all my parts out as best I could. There was a slight redness on the right side of the base of my penis but it wasn't bothering me. I decided to wash myself thoroughly and lock myself back up until today. I figured the 30 minutes or so I was out wouldn't matter when checking for skin conditions. I just unlocked myself a little while ago and discovered that the spot look even more red today though it still isn't bothering me in the slightest. Upon very careful inspection of my CB-3000 cage, I discovered that there was a very slight imperfection at the seam on the right side. I'm guessing that since my jeans force the cage to the left side of the crotch, it's pressing the right side of the cage into the side of my penis. I'll have to get some very fine sandpaper and try to smooth it out. If anyone has any other suggestions, I'd love to hear them.

Looking forward, I went out and bought a key safe yesterday and also created my emergency keys by baking them inside of clay formed into what was supposed to be an orb. Well, it's plainly obvious to anyone that ever sees these things that I am not a sculptor. They look terrible! However, I think they will work perfectly. It wouldn't take much effort to break them open but I can tell you that the effort involved in making even crappy looking ones will discourage me from breaking one open just because I'm horny.

Now that the emergency keys are handled and once the cage has been sufficiently smoothed out, the only remaining obstacle will be overcoming my ability to have an orgasm while wearing the cage. While it's a bit of a disappointment that I can have any kind of an orgasm, I'll readily admit that it's a lot of work and not entirely satisfying. On the other hand, it's a source of some very erotic mental imagery and since my chastity is self-imposed (for now) for my own enjoyment, does it really matter?

Wrapping up, I hope to find some suggestions for smoothing the cage and get that done tomorrow. We have family coming over to visit for the weekend so I probably hold off on locking myself back up until they leave on Sunday. That should give me time to heal up so I can start a 3 day lock up.

emergency key | chastity | adjustments

2010.02.09 23:13:27

knoxtennman

Self-Imposed Chastity → Day 7

I am nearing the end of my 7th day of owning a CB-3000. I'm actually very pleased with how quickly I seem to have dialed in the proper fitting. I still need to file down the guide posts a little more, but I'll take care of that the next time I take the device off. They are actually short enough if I'm naked, but my jeans force the cage to flex a little to one side and that side's post pushes out past the ring and ever so slightly rubs my skin. That should be easy enough to take care of.

I am currently working on a 48 hour continuous lockup. I've been slowly extending the lockup time as I watch my skin for signs of any kind of irritation. So far, so good. I can tell already, however, this is going to be hard on me once I start playing for real. I'm crazy horny almost all the time and having a hard time concentrating on work. It's been a huge test of my willpower to keep from just unlocking myself and taking care of business. But I have to determine what my physical limits are before I can get serious about lock up time. I think a large part of my excitement is just because I'm finally getting to experience something I've fantasized about for so long.

Speaking of getting serious, I've also spent some time thinking about what kind of chastity game to play once I've decided the fit is good enough. My first thought was to get a key safe and use the TimeLock program to do some short term lock-ups (5-10 days). I still need to get the key safe but I have gone out and bought a replacement luggage lock so I can have more than one key. I actually have 4 keys now. One will go in the safe, two of them will be emergency keys kept in my truck and in my nightstand, and the last one I'll give to my wife. While she isn't interested in being an actual "keyholder", I do want to her to have a key should the stars align and the opportunity for us to have sex occurs.

I'm trying to come up with a way to have emergency keys available yet not easily usable. Since I don't have a key holder that cares whether or not I unlock myself, I need to make the use of the emergency key somehow unpalatable to me. I'm thinking of perhaps baking the emergency keys into orbs made from clay obtained from the local hobby store. My hope is that they will be sturdy enough to roll around in my truck change tray (or my nightstand drawer) but be easily broken to retrieve the key should an actual emergency come up. I thought about just wrapping the keys up in tape but that could take a while to undo in an emergency and there's no disincentive if I just get really worked up. Breaking one of the homemade orbs would require me taking the time to make another one to "reset" the emergency key after use. It's not a huge deal in the grand scheme of things, but I'm hoping it will be enough of an effort to make me think about it and not use it if it isn't really an emergency.

One final though for this blog entry. I expect there to be a little discomfort to wearing a chastity belt. I mean, I'm putting a plastic contraption over my genitals that they weren't designed to accommodate. Fair enough and I know I just need to tough it out. What I hadn't planned on was just how much itching I was going to have to deal with from shaving.  The itching is WAY more annoying than the aching when erections are prevented or the rubbing of the ring on the bottom of my balls. I'll keep things trimmed pretty short from now on but I am DONE with shaving!

chastity | chastity games | emergency key | shaving

2010.02.09 22:26:33

knoxtennman

Self-Imposed Chastity → Getting Started

(This post was originally a thread I started in the "Trip in the Belt" forums. I made it on Feb 3, 2010. I'm re-posting it here as it's a pretty decent introductory post for a blog. I may make a few alterations here and there but it will largely be the same information.)

After literally years of thinking/fantasizing about chastity play, I finally ordered a CB-3000 last Monday (Feb 1, 2010) from www.stockroom.com. I was on their site to order another toy for me and my wife. I checked on the prices for chastity devices (as I always do) and was pleasantly surprised to see they were selling the complete kit for around $90. I don't remember if that's a permanent price drop or just a Valentine's Day special, but I just couldn't pass up the deal. It arrived just a few hours ago and I'm already wearing it.

I've been following groups/forums/websites about chastity since the CB-2000 was brand new but never took the plunge until now. While the price was always a factor, the main reason was that I hadn't told my wife about my interest until this past summer. She doesn't fully understand it but we played around with it a little bit (with the honor system on my part, of course) with mixed results.

I am starting out the largest ring and the middle lock pin with enough spacers that the backward-facing guide pins don't stick out more than about 1/4". I am really hoping it won't take long to drop down a ring size or two because the big ring really feels awkward. It doesn't hurt, it just feels like it's taking up too much space. I'm also looking forward to being able to shorten those pins once I arrive at the final size.

I'm a bit concerned about cleaning. I don't think I ever realized just how snug a fit it would be (in circumference) even when I wasn't aroused. That makes sense now that I can see it on me, of course. Still, I can see it's going to be a bit of an effort to stay reasonably clean while wearing it. I have a detachable shower head so that's a plus but I am worried about getting everything dried off well enough to prevent moisture related skin problems. I read on one website about using Q-tips but that seems like an awkward and incomplete solution at best. That same website (keptforher.com I think) said the tube should be put on without lube. Not happening!

I don't have any particular plans or goals for my chastity "trip." I have no intention of or interest in staying locked up or denied orgasm for months at a time. My short term goal is to just play with it and get comfortable with the device and use it to fuel my fantasies. Longer term, I'd like to use it for a week or two at a time where my wife is the keyholder and we play some of the various chastity games that are floating around on various sites involving being let out for T&D or ruined orgams or even full orgasms if I'm really lucky. At this point in our lives, however, my wife is heavily involved in a graduate school program and is way too stressed to think about this kind of thing. It will probably be summer of 2011 before we can even think about that kind of weeks-long sexual activity. Until then, I'll just mess around with my own games always keeping an emergency key handy for those times when my wife wants to "spend some quality time" together. In my book, that's a perfectly valid use of an emergency key!

adjustments | chastity | Intro